Thursday, October 29, 2009

Why high school?

You all know about my sleep issues...but perhaps not about my dream issues. You see, I have this recurring dream/nightmare that I am back at my high school because I haven't finished something. I graduated 16 years ago! Why in the world do I keep thinking that I need to go back to MCHS to finish something left hanging so long ago? It is so strange. I see my teachers in the hallway, I feel myself walking into the front office because someone is calling me in to tell me what I'm missing. They might revoke my diploma which could somehow undermine my bachelors and masters degrees! It's just the strangest dream. Once I thought I'd finished it. I had a dream a couple of years ago that I met with a panel of teachers and they signed off on my last assignment. I remember one of them saying, okay that's it, you're all done! When I woke I felt instant relief. But now, a couple of years later, the dreams about not finishing high school have started anew. Does anyone out there have any idea what this is all about? Sometimes it's a math problem I need to solve, an english paper I still need to write, or some kind of standardized test I still need to take. I just can't figure out what this dream sequence means for my subconscious. I've actually taken my diploma out of the drawer of my nightstand to look at it and verify that I finished high school! Hmm...let me go find that thing right now and I'll just sleep with it curled in my arm. Maybe that'll help.

Friday, October 16, 2009

I'm awake.

My sleep is all screwed up, much to the chagrin of my family...but the work I do is paying the bills right now so they can't complain too much. Had an interesting visit with my doctor on Monday. I was diagnosed with fibromyalgia and shift work sleep disorder, and given some medication to take that might help. We'll see how it goes. No doubt I've had chronic pain since about age 20 that started in my shoulders and became widespread in my late twenties. The problem with fibromyalgia is that many people don't buy it as a real medical condition, even though it now is recognized as such. The FDA has approved medicine used to treat it and it is a actual diagnosis. The first time a physician suggested to me that I might have fibromyalgia was in the summer of 2003. I did not want to even think about it then, so I just brushed it aside. Over a year ago, my current doctor told me he thought that's what I had, but again, I didn't want to listen. Finally I reached such a point of achy despair that I went to see him about it. Hopefully the medications will work. Maybe they'll make me more creative and I can write that bestseller I've been thinking about!

Tuesday, October 6, 2009

Book Review: Miles from Nowhere by Nami Mun

Published in 2009, this debut novel has won some awards and is a bestseller. It's about a girl who runs away from home, in NY no less, and tries to make it own her own. Drug addicted and always broke, she meets a whirlwind of characters along the way: some who help and some who hurt.

I read this book in about 24 hours. Now, after saying that, when I finished the book, I was left with a clammy taste in my mouth. It was good, but the story just didn't seem complete. I'm not sure where the "glimmer of hope" was that they mentioned on the back cover. Written by a Korean girl who grew up in the Bronx, and about a Korean girl who grew up in the Bronx, there were several points that had me thinking that it was some sort of James Frey type memoir where parts of it were true and parts were not. It was written in first person with sparse writing, which I actually like, but very disjointed as a whole book put together. Still, it had me wanting to know more enough so that I kept picking it up on my day off until I finished it. In the end, I don't think I know any more about this flawed character called Joon except that she's several years older and still quite confused.

Check it out at the library for a rainy day like today, but don't purchase your very own copy. That's my take.